Readers Response #2 :Kimmel

    “Bros Before Hos”: The Guy Code is an excerpt from the book Guyland: The Perilous World Where Boys Become Me, written by Michael Kimmel. He examines young men and how the world has influenced the way act and looks at the negative effects it has on children and young adults along the way to becoming “masculine men.” As Kimmel writes, “this is the “Guy Code,” the collection of attitudes, values, and traits that together composes what it means to be a man.”(609)
    In 1976, social psychologist Robert Brannon summarized four basic rules of masculinity that have only changed very little among high school and college age men. The four rules are: 1)“No Sissy Stuff!” or not being perceived as weak, effeminate, or gay. 2) “Be A Big Wheel” referring to the success and power of masculinity measured as wealth, power, and status. 3) “Be a Sturdy Oak” meaning that masculinity means not to be able to respond fully and appropriately to a situation but rather be an inanimate object such as a rock, pillar, or tree. 4) “Give ‘em Hell” make one feel as if you are always daring and showing aggression, living life on the edge and to take risks while paying no attention to what others think. (609-610)
    When Kimmel asked boys what it was in their childhood what it was to be a man and what masculine influences they have had in their life his answer was consistent: “Guys hear the voices of men in their life: fathers, coaches, brothers, uncles, and grandfathers- to inform their ideas of masculinity.” This seemed reasonable and wasn’t extremely surprising, what was though was that Kimmel found out that many men follow these ideals of masculinity not because they want to impress women, but to rather get positively evaluated by other men. “Masculinity is largely a “homosocial” experience: performed for, and judged by, other men.
    Something I found really interesting in this reading was a stat found by Kimmel. He states that, “Men ages 19-29 are three times less likely to wear seat belts than women the same age. Before they turn 19 though, young men are actually MORE likely to wear seat belts. It’s as if they suddenly get the idea that as long as they’re driving the car, they’re completely in control, and therefore safe.” I found that statistic scary and also pretty true and could relate. It is just something that seems like is just popping up or happening to kids and all of a sudden changing the way they live and so called become men. It is something that needs to change and needs to be brought up and talked about in order to change and be re-evaluated.
    Kimmel finishes the article by explaining that, “masculinity is a constant test- always up for grabs, always needing to be proved.” Some children are being forced to start early and some learn later but nonetheless boys learn that their connection to mother will emasculate them, and make them a Mama’s boy. “Along the way the feelings they associate with their mother- compassion, nurturance, vulnerability, and dependency. This suppression and repudiation is the origin of the Boy Code.”